Differences Between Collaborative Divorce and Traditional Divorce - Collaborative Family Law Association of St. Louis

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Differences Between Collaborative Divorce and Traditional Divorce

CFLA Former Member

The primary reason why some parties choose collaborative divorce rather than the traditional route is to minimize the hard feelings and emotions involved in contested litigation. Collaborative divorce is a viable option when you and your spouse are able to find a way to work out issues together.

This brings us to the questions on which approach is better? Ultimately, a party going through a divorce has to decide. After all, you are the person who knows your spouse and you know yourself even better. Thus, you would have to analyze whether you think an amicable resolution is possible.

Collaborative divorce is non-adversarial. This means that you are not fighting with your spouse to win an advantage over the other. The main purpose of collaborative law is to help you and your spouse find a solution without getting a judge involved.

While experts, including accountants or appraisers, may be used in a regular divorce, in collaborative divorce these experts are generally neutrals.  This means that any information these professionals share during the collaborative process is confidential and can’t be used later in court if the case does not settle in the collaborative divorce process.

There are circumstances where a collaborative divorce may not work, including where there is a major power imbalance, if there has been domestic violence or where the positions of the parties are diametrically opposed. It also depends on whether you believe you and your soon-to-be ex are truly sincere about getting along.  It takes a certain amount of maturity to face your ex and talk things out and it may also be a painful process.

If collaborative divorce is an option for you, it can alleviate negative feelings and make for a better relationship between you and your ex in the long run. This is especially helpful when spouses share joint custody and co-parenting becomes essential.  Studies have shown that kids do better overall when parents can co-parent and get along after divorce.

About the Author : Kirk Stange

Kirk Stange founded Stange Law Firm, PC in 2007 with wife Paola. Since the first location in 2007, Kirk has dedicated himself to flourishing the family law firm into what it is today. In addition to being a Founding Partner of the firm, Kirk also enjoys spending time educating attorneys and other law professionals at CLE Seminars through NBI, the Missouri Bar, and many other organizations. Additionally, Kirk serves as an adjunct professor in the role of a trial skills instructor. Kirk obtained his Juris Doctor from the University of Missouri – Columbia School of Law. Kirk is licensed to practice in the state of Missouri, Illinois, Kansas, and the United States District Court for the Eastern District of Missouri. Notably, Kirk has been recognized for his hard work and dedication to the practice of family law. These awards range from: Super Lawyers for Missouri and Kansas Super Lawyers for Family Law Magazine, Top 10 Family Law Attorney in Missouri by National Academy of Family Law Attorneys, Lead Counsel Rated for Divorce/Family Law, and many more accolades. The Founding Partner has also been a published author on multiple different occasions. Kirk authored a chapter in a book through Thomson Reuters (Aspatore Publishing) in 2012 titled: Strategies for Military Family Law: Leading Lawyers on Navigating Family Law in the Armed Forces (Inside the Minds). Kirk published a full-length book through Thomson Reuters (Aspatore Publishing) in 2014 titled: Prenuptial Agreements Line by Line. Further, in 2015, Kirk authored another chapter in a book through Thomson Reuters (Aspatore Published) titled: Strategies for Illinois Family Law: Leading Lawyers on Leveraging Alternative Dispute Resolution, Negotiating Alimony and Child Support, and Managing Client Expectations (Inside the Minds). Note: The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely upon advertisements. Kirk Stange is responsible for the content. Principal place of business 120 South Central Ave, Suite 450, Clayton, MO 63105.

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