Collaborative Divorce Process: 6 Insights From a Collaborative Divorce Coach - Collaborative Family Law Association of St. Louis

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Collaborative Divorce Process: 6 Insights From a Collaborative Divorce Coach

CFLA Former Member

Divorce is on your horizon and having experienced professionals in your corner will make the collaborative divorce process less time consuming and arduous.

If you are seeing a therapist, hopefully you are, your therapist should be one of those helpers getting you through the emotional obstacle course, as well as providing you logistical information.

Even after you decide on the Collaborative Approach to divorce, the idea of sitting in the same room with your soon to be ex is an unnerving thought.

Many clients find comfort in knowing exactly what that experience is going to be like. What can you expect from the professionals in the room? What are you allowed to say? What will that first session be like?

Everyone knows what litigation is like; get an attorney and start the fight, wait, e-mails, extensions…

Collaborative divorce is going to offer you the opportunity to sit in the same room with your spouse which is going to eliminate the grape vine scenario between your attorneys and yourselves. You will know what is going on every step of the way and all the professionals in the room will have the same goals as you which is to come to a timely agreement you are comfortable with.

There's room for your feelings and genuine thoughts in the collaborative divorce process in a way that isn't readily available to you in traditional divorce.

Many counseling clients ask, “Will I be able to say how angry I am or that he/she doesn’t seem to care about my wellbeing at all after 12 years of marriage?” The answer is, yes! These feelings and others are what drive the process or hinder it.  The collaborative divorce process is definitely the place to get it out.

You may be willing to enter into this process, but you are not excited about standing in the elevator with your spouse.

That is quite fine. Details like this are worked out at the very beginning of collaborative divorce process. The professionals guiding you will make sure that you understand what to expect of them, as well as jointly create expectations for how you will interact with each other.

It will get better.

So much support is offered with this style of divorce that you will heal much faster than you’d expect. As you have consistent team meetings it will become easier to meet with, and interact with, your soon to be ex.  All of this lays the groundwork for effective emotional healing and co-parenting if you have children.

Collaborative divorce supports a calmer, better planned transition than others.  To learn about your Missouri divorce process options contact one of our experienced St. Louis Collaborative Law professionals today.

About the Author : Kristin Craren

Kristin is a former member of CFLA.

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